Ok here we are. April 2, 2011, almost 12 months since my last post. It's not that I haven't been talking about my life & about Zach, I just used other outlets for it (FaceBook & BBC Preemie Moms). It was really just too painful to write down everything that I was going through the last year, moving, starting life as a true single parent, increasing work hours etc. I had some really sad moments wondering why someone wouldn't want me & especially why someone wouldn't want my amazing son. Thankfully I worked through those issues & realized that they were not my issues, they belonged to someone else.

Zach has been doing great this last year.

April 2010--Crawling

May 2010--Pulling to stand & cruising

June 2010--two more teeth, trip back to WI

July 2010--??? but I'm sure that he did something ; )

August 2010--started walking!!!

Sept 2010--two more teeth, started talking (First word was UP)

Oct 2010--more words, more walking

Nov 2010--two more teeth, Trip to Monterey, language explosion started

Dec 2010--four teeth

Jan 2010--four teeth

Feb 2010--

March 2010--Counts 1-8 & learned all of his letters, started using sentences

I obviously need to go back & fill all of the months in.

Anyway, now we are at a point where Zach is likely to have mild Sensory Integration issues & has balance & coordination issues. I will be getting him more evaluations & have started working with him at home.

I was thinking tonight about the essay "Welcome to Holland". I guess that I had really felt like we got the side trip to Italy after all. Zach was doing so well without having many "preemie" issues to deal with that I forgotten that we had been in Holland.

When I look back at my/our journey, I realize that by the time that I found myself in Holland, I had just been getting used to the idea that I was going to go to Italy. I wasn't even all that excited about all of the aspects of my trip to Italy. I knew that I didn't have the best travel partner & was really worried about how the trip would go (much less the travel in Italy). Then boom, I was in Holland & it was really horrible (giving birth at 25 weeks 6 days & my son being so incredibly sick. My travel partner going MIA 3 weeks into the trip just when Zach got really, really sick & needed surgery).

Thankfully found some wonderful travel guides along the way in Holland. I mean really, how many travel guides cry with you when you are at your lowest points. I got used to Holland & then in the last couple of months I felt like we had taken that lovely side trip to Italy & while I wasn't totally relaxed, it was nice.

I know that the new issues are not that severe & can be dealt with, but for a short time I had a hard time accepting it.

As always, when you find yourself unexpectedly in Holland, you look around, get used to the new area, find more wonderful travel guides & move ahead.